The sun risin', dangle in the...Golden and fair, in the sky

~Fleet Foxes (Sun it Rises)

I should be working on homework as the quarter is on its way out. But, instead, I finished a book this morning while sipping green tea in the sunlight and beauty of Lake Sammamish. My tea is cold now and, while I sit at my desk with no view and no sunlight, I don’t want to write a paper on my philosophy of education: I want to write about the book.

A friend of mine, Holly, recommended Through Painted Deserts to me at camp this summer. It was one of those books that she hugged herself and closed her eyes when she talked about it. I thought I should give this one a try if it meant that much to her. So, I went and picked it up at a bookstore before I left for Europe, not knowing the interesting parallels it would have to my life in real-time.

The book chronicles the pilgrimage of two guys in their young twenties, road-tripping from Houston, Texas to Oregon and their experiences along the way. I started it on the plane to Germany and thought it funny that I was leaving home (though my home has been transient for years now in some sense) as the two men in the book. One had never seen Oregon, and the other hailed from Oregon but had roamed around the country with no money, a crappy VW van and no timeline, priorities or agenda. He did whatever he wanted and allowed himself to meet and get to know people along his journeys, working odd jobs for cash, living in the woods and climbing mountains whenever he got the chance. Sometime I think that taking a year off and doing something like that could be a very important experience for me. I would do it in a heartbeat.

I have wanted to hike the Grand Canyon for a long time, and found myself in the pages of their painful, exhausting and awesome experience, wanting to go even more. I talked to my friend, Andrew, that night and we penciled in the end of September 2009 to make a trip all the way down the canyon. I can’t wait. Throughout the trip, surviving on pocket change, benevolent mechanics and free meals, the guys have many important and somewhat profound conversations in the absence of a car stereo. They also begin to realize that God has things to teach them through coincidental occurrences.

As they arrived in Oregon and the author beautifully describes the terrain and smells, it made me feel as though I had never left. They stopped for gas in Eugene, continued on to Portland in I-5 and over to Sisters via highway 26 through Gresham and Sandy on their way to work at Black Butte Ranch, which was less than an hour from where I used to live. I have traveled these roads numerous times and enjoyed reading his impressions of Mt. Hood and central Oregon in all of its late-spring splendor. He names each of the mountains that I saw every day on my drive into work, and experiences the high desert view of the stars. Breathtaking, I can tell you.



It made me miss Bend a bit. But, more than that, it made me grateful for the experiences I’ve had in the last few years. I am lucky and I need to remember that, especially in the midst of putting off the piles of homework I need to do, realizing how much weight I’ve gained in the past year, commuting to Seattle too much, fighting feelings of interest in a boy who will probably never return my feelings and learning how to live at home again. I am blessed. I live in a beautiful place, have been privileged to see and learn many amazing things both in the US and abroad, and most importantly, have met outstanding people everywhere I have roamed. How much more impacting are those relationships and experiences than my souvenirs and photos, or all of my possessions sitting at home?

That is what these two road-trippers come to at the end of the book. They decide that maybe the answers to life are much simpler than we think they are. Maybe life is all about taking time to breathe, enjoy and experience God’s creation and goodness and love the people he has put us on earth with. And, letting ourselves be loved.

“I’ve learned, too, that I don’t really know very much about
anything. I mean, I used to have all these theories about life. I
thought I had everybody figured out, even God, but I don’t. I think the
woods, being away from all the clingy soot of commercialism, have taught me life
is enormous, and I am very tiny in the middle of it. I feel, at times,
like a droplet of water in a raging river. I know for a fact that as a
grain of sand compares in size to the earth itself, I compare in size to the
cosmos. I am that insignificant. And yet the chemicals in my brain
that make me feel beauty when I look up at the stars, when I watch the sunset,
indicate I must be here for a reason. I think I would sum it up this
way: life is not a story about me, but it is begin told to me, and I can
be glad of that. I think that is the why of life and, in fact, the why of
this ancient faith I am caught up it: to enjoy God. The stars were created
to dazzle us, like a love letter; light itself is just a metaphor, something
that exists outside of time, made up of what seems like nothing, infinite in its
power, something that can be experienced but not understood, like God.
Relationships between men and women indicate something of the nature of
God – that He is relational, that He feels love and loss. It’s all
metaphor, and the story is about us; it’s about all of us who God made, and God
Himself, just enjoying each other. It strikes me how far the commercials
are from this reality, how deadly they are, perhaps. Months ago I would
have told you life was about doing, about jumping through religious hoops, about
impressing other people, and my actions would have told you this is done by
buying possessions or keeping a good image or going to church. I don’t
believe that anymore. I think we are supposed to stand in deserts and
marvel at how the sun rises. I think we are supposed to sleep in meadows
and watch stars dart across space and time. I think we are supposed to
love our friends and introduce people to the story, to the peaceful, calming why
of life. I think life is spirituality” (244-245).

Oh, and yes, the book is by Donald Miller.
But don’t take my word for it...

it was not my imagination?

~The Cranberries (Just My Imagination)

Signs of the apocalypse. Let me set the scene for you: January 5, 2009, around 10:30am, this girl will (perhaps) realize that she is about to step into a college general chemistry course at SPU for the first time. "What?" you say. "Katie, you took general chemistry in 2002 at SPU!"

You're right. But this time...I'll be teaching it. Oh holy night. In some strange twist of fate and/or gross overestimation of my skills, I've been hired as a full-time adjunct Chemistry professor at SPU for winter quarter and for one class spring quarter. I have an office. A computer. A teacher's edition of the textbook. A barf bag on hand for when I come to my senses and realize I'm going to be responsible for about 75 university students in less than two months while also taking my own university courses. My professors, now peers. My peers, now my sheep to herd. The universe may implode.

A view of the registration options:



..and, get this: they're trusting me to teach an upper division PHYSICAL CHEMISTRY course! It's going to be quite an eleven-week cluster#%*@.


Join me, if you will, on this six month adventure as I learn to teach high school Chemistry while concurrently teaching university Chemistry. You thought I dropped off the face of the planet while I was in graduate school in Oregon? You ain't seen nothin' yet.

Do you want to see the world? Do you want to see the world in a different way?

~The Kooks (“See the World”)

It’s been quite a year (or two) for me in terms of re-evaluation self and calling, mixed with attempts to simultaneously move forward towards that ever evasive “person I’d like to become.” It feels closer than ever before. My beliefs, politics, lifestyle, perspectives and perceptions of myself have all come under intentional attack this year. Even my hobbies and interests are different now (I had a hard time recently getting my friend Jason to believe that I just don’t care as much about sports as I used to!). Helped along my journey by amazing friends/mentors, experiences, some amazingly poignant books and speeches, I have changed profoundly. I sometimes joke with friends that if I had actually found someone to marry in college, he wouldn’t recognize me anymore. I have so many people to thank for their contributions to this woman ever in search and need of progress.

If you’ve been a reader of my blog since its inception in 2006, you may recall my struggles with the harsh reality of living alone when I was in graduate school in Oregon. It’s easy for phrases like “we were created to be in community” to enter one ear and quickly exit stage left, but it’s harder to ignore when it’s being lived. Reduced to my two Chemistry courses, my Tai Chi class, knitting and watching an unhealthy amount of movies (thanks to the modern phenomenon of Netflix), I found myself locked up in my personality-rich ancient studio apartment the majority of my six months in Eugene with very little personal interaction. Thank God I didn’t know about YouTube then, or it would have been worse!

As much as I have wished to live alone again at times in the past two years and find that I am becoming more of an introvert, I always recall this experience and will forever use it as a metric for evaluating unhealthy levels of solitude, especially when I’m not using that solitude for personal growth. Community is an amazing gift and, even when it’s slightly-to-extremely uncomfortable at the outset, getting involved and being truly known are human responsibilities and rights.

Community, in many varied forms, has inspired, spoken truth, challenged and encouraged me into significant change. A recovering legalist from my teen years, I have been so blessed to be in conversation with folks that have called into question the stereotypically held “Christian” views on marriage, life, science (this, obviously, has been a big one for years, since I’m a scientist), following Jesus and, most importantly, emphasized an imperative quality of a Christ-follower: thinking for oneself! There is a big movement among certain groups of Christians that desires to be told what to believe, how to act, what not to do and how to vote. This scares me. I don’t believe this is Christ’s design for the church. We need to learn to discern, think, study, converse, debate and wrestle with the tough issues, not just take what our pastor or someone else we deem “smarter” or more “godly” says as the final word.

Oftentimes, though, it’s hard. It feels like a burden and I get unmotivated very easily. So, I have learned that the best way to force myself to continue running toward single-mindedly following Christ is to place myself in situations and around people that require me to face the person I am and come to grips with the sickness, pride, idolatry, self-centeredness and emptiness in my life and my utter need for Jesus. Not to say that I try to make myself feel poorly just for kicks, but I do try to be real and consider what needs to be done to “point this ship in the right direction.”

This is getting long and I didn’t even broach any of the specific topics I’ve been pondering lately. Perhaps another day.

"I was playing some stinky, filthy, manky chops..."

"...Jemaine: you had some rotten mutton on the grill
Bret: just some off rhythms, really
J: you had some decomposing flesh on a skillet
B: just rancid grooves, i was layin' on 'em
J: the...skanky...beefs beats you were laying down"

~Flight of the Conchords (spoken word)

A girl sitting at home with a bad cold found this on the interwebs today. It brought her much happiness. (It's long, but really worth it. Their banter is better than their music, I think)

_____________________________________

Anyone who has known me in the last five months knows I'm a bit of a fan of Flight of the Conchords from New Zealand. I blame it on my coworker in Bend, David, who played Business Time for me at work in May...I then proceeded to watch pretty much all of their stuff on YouTube that day (at work) and form a slight celebrity crush on Jemaine (like about a million women on this planet). At camp this summer, I found several fans of the group and we had all sorts of inside jokes involving lyrics to various songs. The theme of the summer with me and my good friend Sonja was from their song The Most Beautiful Girl (in the room): "Lookin' round the room, I can tell that you are the most beautiful girl in the...room...and when you're on the street (depending on the street) I bet you are definitely in the top three..."

Sonja and I, along with two other friends from camp (Jenni and Andrew) came up to Seattle for SubPop's 20th anniversary show at Marymoor. We didn't get tickets because they were sold out, so we spent the afternoon dodging police officers and security personnel telling us to go across the street (what the heck? they're sold out - let us loiter!), all to hear the Fleet Foxes, Iron and Wine and Flight of the Conchords. Well worth the almost getting arrested part. I'll post my one video from my favorite song, Jenny, later.

Fast forward to last week, when all of my hopes were dashed: Jemaine got married in August and his wife just gave birth to their son, Sophocles, a week or so ago! What? Jemaine - I thought we really had something...Blast :) I'm "over" it now, but I am considering forming a support group for all the women who are quite disappointed.

A couple of days ago, I found their first TV appearances in New Zealand in 2000 (two years after they officially formed). Let's just say, they've really come a long way with their banter, humor, comedic timing, musical abilities and songwriting in eight years.

I recommend them highly, especially if you just need to smile.

Here as the caves of my memory fade, I’ll hold to the first one

~Fleet Foxes (Drops in the River)

It has come to pass. In many ways, I can’t believe it. In others, I’m not surprised.

(Picture courtesy of Getty Images)

So many thoughts ran through my head while I witnessed the elation at Grant Park in Chicago last night and the impassioned, poignant and inspiring speech by President Elect Obama, where at least two of my friends stood watching. I received a call from my good friend Katie in DC where, at 12:45am, she was outside on a busy street celebrating, yelling and dancing with many of her fellow Americans. Another friend of mine has already purchased a plane ticket to DC for Obama’s inauguration on January 20th, 2009. Memories like those will last a lifetime.

Because my dad’s birthday fell on Election Day this year, I ended up at home last night. A quieter but still very meaningful celebration took place. I do not cry often, but I found myself tearing up (and dancing around) several times as I watched the coverage and considered the impact of such an evening.

In my life, there have been several memorable and historical moments, both negative and positive. I just saw the remnants of the Berlin Wall that fell when I was only five years old firsthand two months ago. I can tell you exactly where I was, what I was doing, what I was wearing and how I reacted to the news on that morning of September 11, 2001. What will I carry with me the rest of my life about yesterday? What will be impressed in your memory? What will we tell future generations about November 4, 2008?

Yet, simply a memory of a historically significant election is not why Obama ran or was elected. I think people are getting so caught up in the fact that racism got one huge slap in the face last night, that they may fail to realize that it is not obliterated, nor is slavery, sexism, persecution, and a whole host of other problems still sadly present in our world. In all of the excitement that the election of Obama brings to many in the world (and to me), I think it is important to realize that what he said last night is so very true:

“I know you didn’t do this just to win an election and I know you didn’t do it for me. You did it because you understand the enormity of the task that lies ahead. For even as we celebrate tonight, we know the challenges that tomorrow will bring are the greatest of our lifetime - two wars, a planet in peril, the worst financial crisis in a century. Even as we stand here tonight, we know there are brave Americans waking up in the deserts of Iraq and the mountains of Afghanistan to risk their lives for us. There are mothers and fathers who will lie awake after their children fall asleep and wonder how they’ll make the mortgage, or pay their doctors bills, or save enough for college. There is new energy to harness and new jobs to be created; new schools to build and threats to meet and alliances to repair.

The road ahead will be long. Our climb will be steep. We may not get there in one year or even one term, but America - I have never been more hopeful than I am tonight that we will get there. I promise you - we as a people will get there.

There will be setbacks and false starts. There are many who won’t agree with every decision or policy I make as President, and we know that government can’t solve every problem. But I will always be honest with you about the challenges we face. I will listen to you, especially when we disagree. And above all, I will ask you join in the work of remaking this nation the only way its been done in America for two-hundred and twenty-one years - block by block, brick by brick, calloused hand by calloused hand.”

This will be an uphill battle for Barack and the country. Things will not go perfectly. I cannot believe that anyone, let alone TWO people, would volunteer to be president in such turbulent, unsure and, frankly, worrisome times. But, I am honored, inspired and hopeful that change will come in time because of our new President’s hard work, humility, encouragement and unmatched inspiration.

Let us remember, as so many of my wise friends have already penned in their blogs, that Christ was, is and always will be sovereign and our savior no matter who our Commander in Chief is. No woman or man can fill those shoes, and we should not expect them to. What is required of McCain and Obama supporters (and the rest of the country) alike is to stop the bashing, the regretting, the insinuations, the disrespect, the attacks, and learn how to voice and act on political opinion in a mature and useful manner while giving Barack Obama and his administration the opportunity and support to bring about change we need.

May we be as involved, interested and passionate in the coming four years as we were this last week.

And, read this beautifully written article.

Don't teach me about politics and government: just tell me who to vote for

~Derek Webb ("A New Law")

This is another appropriate song for today

I cannot express how much I am ready for tomorrow. Ready for change. Ready for history to be made. Ready for inspiration and excitement about the future of politics. Ready for new ads on TV.

I have been ecstatic at times this past year how people of all races, creeds, ages, perspectives and political leanings have decided not to vote for party, but for issues and individuals. My pastor gave a good sermon last night on the need to be interested in politics all four years of a term, not just the two months leading up to the election. This resonated heavily with me. I'm no politician, but I need to care enough to keep tabs on what my government is (or isn't) doing for my community.

We see it every election - people impassioned to the point of losing friends (and respect), writing terrible things on public forums, and using religion to justify or ostracize. Enough! It's time for us to see our continual role in politics and to walk the walk on issues we talk a LOT of talk about in October. Some Christians (and hopefully non-Christians too!) are starting to realize that Jesus was not white, middle-class, Republican nor Democrat. The Bible speaks to issues of abortion and homosexuality less than 15 times, but poverty and caring for the poor over 2000 times. Pastor Eugene also made the point that scripture tells us Jesus WAS involved in politics. He called us to be independent, thoughtful, intelligent, respectful and mature in our voting.

That's the key point I'm seeing in all of this: respect. I've been harping on my parents since I got back from Europe in September because they were (and may still be) undecided on the presidential race. It's so easy for me to say: "what are you thinking?" and rant about the insanity of the election, but when it comes down to it, what matters is that each American votes. And by vote, I don't mean showing up at the polls and making pretty patterns out of your chads, I mean thinking long and hard, wrestling with issues of belief, morality, community and future. I mean reading, listening, discussing and caring about the election enough to put more energy into research than is expended complaining about the situations of the past eight years.

There is no right or wrong party. There is no perfect candidate. I have close friends voting for both candidates. I love them all. We don't need to move to another country if our pick doesn't come out on top. What we need to do is be ready for change, get involved and support our president tomorrow, no matter who it is. "Change you can believe in" and "Country First" are great mottos, but let our motto now be "Whatever happens, we're in it together!"

In less than 35 hours, we will be able to move forward. It is my hope that we will do so as a united community that can learn to love despite disagreements.

Now it is time to go put my ballot in the mail.