I need a hero!

~Bonnie Tyler (Holding out for a Hero)

I thought it was going to be a boring, cold evening at the "office" tonight. I was sorely mistaken.

Before I present the insane story that is about to follow, let me preface by saying I've been losing things (in addition to my mind) a lot lately. I always get so mad at myself and nostalgic when I lose something, but then am hit over the head every time with the reality that stuff doesn't matter as much as it seems to that minute you realize you lost your favorite antique earrings (that happened to me in DC this year). It's just stuff.

Try telling that to yourself when your purse gets stolen two days before Christmas.

My part-time job in between teaching at SPU and teaching at God-knows-where high school next year is the ever-revered position of the barista (aka helpless punching bag for picky folks) at a new, very swanky, mall in the area. Outdoors. In the winter. It's really an amazing experience selling coffee to people who just spent $1000+ on shoes but don't tip me. But I digress.

I finished my last break tonight in our storage room and headed back out to face the cold and lack of customers. I was getting settled and went to turn on my heater when I saw a lady casually strolling out of our storage room. At first I figured she might have thought it was a store-front (as many do), but the fact that she had been inside made me a little nervous, so I quickly went to check on my belongings.

Sure enough, my bag was gone. *Expletives streaming through my mind as I try to figure out what to do* Getting something stolen is an extremely helpless feeling, I learned tonight. I also found that adrenaline enables me to run about 250% of my normal sprinting speed.

For a short moment, I was contemplating finding this lady on my own and channeling Chuck Norris on her ass, but luckily as I ran through the thin crowds of high-class shoppers to ask the concierge to radio security, she wasn't anywhere to be seen. I truly have no idea what I would have done if I found her on my own.

The security guys and I happen to converge outside an employee corridor, and while I'm semi-coherently explaining what happened, a lady who matches the perp's description exits the employee door. Peculiar. And what does she do? Goes to my espresso cart to buy a coffee from me! I swear, you can't make this stuff up! I pointed to her and told the security guy that she might be the one, so he went to ask her a few questions. Meanwhile, the rest of security shows up and we start talking about what happened in front of this lady, and somehow in the mayhem, she again just slowly strolls away. The security supervisor follows her off the property, I call 911 for the first time in my life, and one of my security friends goes to try to see if the perp stashed my bag anywhere. He finds it quickly with everything in it! This totally does not compute (and still doesn't really). My wallet was open, and the cash had been taken out, but I found it in another part of the bag. Wait, really? Even I wouldn't be that crappy of a criminal. Thankfully she was!

The police officer that showed up was amazing. She was so nice and didn't make me feel like a total douche for calling 911 when nothing was *actually* stolen. Apparently, someone has been stealing from employees down the street at another mall (oh Bellevue, how you have been corrupted!), so they were happy to have the chance to get an ID on this lady. The perp ended up coming back into the mall and wandering around the parking garage (safe to say she wasn't "all there"), where she quickly admitted everything to the security guards and police when they started questioning her. Drunk and looking to steal money for rent from rich patrons of this mall. Not the best idea. Especially because the only cash I had was in Washingtons and Abes.

Such drama I would never have imagined for my evening, but at least that last hour of work was entertaining! I can laugh now because all is well, but if my bag and its contents were not with me tonight, my tune would be much different. I don't consider myself super materialistic, but as much as it sucks to have possessions stolen, it's worse that I know I would freak out so much over losing my ipod or some cash.

An interesting perspective especially as Christmas draws near at break-neck speed. Perhaps I should try to think less about those CDs I'm hoping I'll unwrap in a few hours and more about how my life is changed daily by the people I come in contact with, my union with the confusing yet loving and mystical God, and love that makes no rational sense yet exists everywhere if we just keep our eyes open.