I can handle whatever I stumble upon, most of the time...

...Bob Dylan was so right.

I don't know if people have realized that all my posts are lyrics of songs yet. Maybe I should start putting the band and song at the beginning of the entry...

It's hard to put into words what has happened in the short span of 5 days. I have had some successes, many frustrations, more drama and emotion than I care for, and quite a bit of exhaustion. Though it's been hard, I can say that I am halfway finished with my summer school classes, and have more than one prospect for a great Chemistry internship.

Monday morning:
*8am. I find myself at Forrest Paint Company for my first of three job interviews this week (looking smoking hot and professional, I might add). The interview was amazingly low key, and I found out that I was the only one who was asked to interview (translation: I have the job if I want it). I have no clue WHY they singled me out, but it was flattering to say the least.
*9:15am. Just getting into the car, I feel my phone and get a call from my dad saying that my grandma slipped into a coma the night previous.
*10am. My blessed, sweet, funny Grandma Louise passes away.
*10:15am. I get to lab and am immediately overwhelmed and completely confused with our tasks.
*12:30pm. I am told about my grandma on my lunch break from lab.

...and the rest of the week stayed just about as crazy. Lab was unbelievable! We had to make 4 different polymers (2 rubbery, 2 rigid; one of each being colored) with absolutely no guidance except that we had to use at least one polyester, polystyrene, and phenol-formaldehyde resin. Basically, this sent us on a wild goose chase for 4 days armed only with plasticizers, charcoal and baking soda to try to make these things. Surprisingly, Google was not of much help. The job interviews all went well, and now I just wait to see what happens. How long, I'm not sure, but I'm not worried.

Death never comes at a convienient time, this is for sure. I am so sad that I missed out on the hugs, tears, reminiscing and laughs that come with the territory when a family member passes away. I am now grandmaless, and it's a different world for me. I have 2 wonderful grandpas whom I adore, but their wives have especially had a profound effect on my life and definitely shape much of the woman I am and am still becoming.

Grandma Irene, who died more than 5 years ago in a very strange and suprising turn of events was an absolutely amazing person. She lived a life of hardwork, selflessness, creativity and fun. Grandma beans, as my brother called her, could do anything. She kept a garden, cooked delectable dishes year-round, at every meal (oh, her rolls), knitted sweaters while watching cartoons with us, made my mom's wedding dress, and took up ceramics and oil painting later in life. She taught me the value of family, story telling (she embellished just the right amount), laughing, loving and being tough. Grandma lived through polio, cancer and was dealt more than her fair share of ailments throughout her life, but I never heard her complain. She was funny and could talk anyone's ear off (sound like me?), but also enjoyed quiet nights of bridge or allowing my grandpa to kick her butt at gin rummy. Something was always in the oven, and her family was always her first priority. Memories seem endless of my childhood with grandma beans: picking blueberries, learning to sew and knit, snapping beans and pulling carrots, listening to stories about life on the farm, helping her pin her hair in curls every night and eating endless cans of pringles.

My grandma Louise was a lady who still loved, valued and humbly served her family, but in a different manner, and thus she taught me much different things than grandma beans. She was an intellectual, an avid reader, a great cook, kept an incredibly neat house, and was passionate and headstrong. Coming from a pain and sorrow-filled childhood, there are many things about grandma I didn't know until the last few years, and I'm sure there are numerous skills and stories I never heard. She loved gardening and massacring me in Scrabble and Boggle (although I'm sure she let me win every once in a while). I learned from her that women are highly valuable, capable and intelligent - something that I am so thankful for. She never missed a chance to encourage me, and even 2 weeks ago when I saw her last, she told me how proud she was of me going to grad school and being successful. Grandma modeled strength, dignity and independence, and was intrigued by travel, natural beauty and current events. Because of her, I value and believe in myself more, know that women are of extreme worth, and realize that the world is a huge place that I can explore and discover! It was hard to see her go downhill the last 10 years while struggling with Parkinson's Disease and growing increasingly frustrated with her immobility, but we still had good family times. I am also sad that I missed our last birthday party (she was July 4th, I'm the 1st).

I figured this year while I was away would be "the year," and yes, she was definitely ready to go, as much as one can be. Thankfulness pours out of me when I realize I got to see her with my brother just 2 weeks before her passing and we had a great conversation. It's hard to be away, and I'm definitely yearning for hugs from family and friends and missing those stories and memories of grandma Louise that are said over meals. This week was a hard one, and I'm praying for rejuvination this weekend. Here's to two great grandmas - I hope I can become half the awesomeness they were and live lives of humility, fun, adventure and learning like they did!